Oath

Today…

I swear an oath
to fight
myself

I swear that
come pain
I will not waiver

to turn my head
in the face of
temptation

no matter what
was before
this is now

step by step
mile by mile
layer by layer

no more time
stand and fight
me vs. me

one of us has to win…

Written by Matthew – 2016
© 2016 This Mortal Flesh

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52 thoughts on “Oath

      • I liked this comment not for its last sentence, with which I don’t agree, but for the explanation it gave to the poem. Though I must say, this is also how I’d read it myself.
        I’m very glad you took this oath in public, because often, taking oath in public incites us, makes us better able to stick with them!
        I just hope the good, happy *you* wins. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  1. I’m rooting for you, Matt. Change is always painful; one tries to hold on to the familiar, no matter how self-destructive. A good friend helped me see the error of my ways, and has been a great inspiration to reach for the light instead of wallow in darkness.

    Liked by 2 people

      • I understand…food tastes so good!
        I had to replace it with something else, which for me, is walking and exercise. Plus modifying what I eat. I don’t diet, just eat healthier. Wanting to make the change is half the battle.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I always found that battling my weight was so hard. The difficulty, with an addiction like this, unlike cigarettes or alcohol, is that you can’t stop ‘cold turkey’, because if you do, well… you die!
        Though I must say, sometimes, a fast is a very good way of breaking bad habits and starting new ones.
        Have you ever considered trying homeopathy, or osteopathy? These can help tremendously shifting the negative self talk that is leading us to overeating.
        Learning to love yourself, extra-weight and all, is sometimes the first step.
        Good luck Matt. It’s a tough road, but… it’s worth travelling, because once you succeed, you’ve proven yourself that you are really living for yourself, taking care of yourself.
        One of the things I told my osteopath last night was exactly that. I *know* all the things I need to do to take better care of my health.
        The real, deep problem is: do I feel I deserve to be taken care of? Just hearing myself say these words yesterday was enough to kick ,e into a better frame of mind today!

        Hugs!
        Plenty

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’ve never thought about reaching out to a professional. I feel like you said though…I know the way but I get hindered in the application. I’m off and on with it and I always have 10,000 excuses. I do love myself, weight and all. I’m 6’4″ so I carry it well. I just feel like I intimidate other people lol.

        Liked by 1 person

      • That’s probably why you need this weight. So that others see you.
        Someone once told me, the only reason you’re big is because you need that cushion to protect your aura. It’s all over the place.
        Thought there was a lot of truth to that statement!
        Maybe your problem is similar?

        Liked by 1 person

      • You probably are all those things too!
        Which is neither here nor there. But it means you have to learn how to protect yourself. And as long as you are not able to do so, your body will do it for you 🙂
        Or something along those lines!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I just re-read this and thought I should say: fighting yourself may not be the best way. Acceptance is so much more powerful and less energy consuming (for the soul, I mean!)
    Often, fighting leads to you hating yourself, at least on some level, even if only a small part of you. Then… that part fights back. And you eat more.
    At least that’s how I see it now. The fight with my weight is far from over, but… I decided not to fight any more 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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