Mine was a life tired at 17
peaks and troughs of that life
had proven too much for me
I fell into wanton rife—
immersion into absolute fantasy

A mask so deeply affixed—
to the light I was willfully lost—
my soul woefully betwixt
I knew, but pondered not, the cost
my eyes on fleshly desires transfixed

‘Twas words of all things that broke the spell
spoken by a friend—or rival?—just as well
“what are you trying to be?—it’s not who you are”
In depth of night—my mirror gazed back from a far
pierced flesh—pagan symbols—how far had I fell?


I strived to find a path back from night
But still growing shadows—quenchless—
with a perpetual thirst held me tight
My shackled soul convulsed—too fervent to repress—
for in the recess shimmered the faintest fleck of light

In receding darkness my aging mind began to see
That the light was love calling to me—even in the black
a sunseed—planted so deep—had clung so fiercely to me
in measuring silence it waited—for the maturing shadow to crack
for a divergence of the veil—to seize its opportunity

‘Twas the light of love that endured—even after my darkest fall
That love with endless patience—bursting through the shadowed wall
But ‘twas love’s light that also broke me—my sins now made clear
Pierced—I sought again darkness—in pretense—out of fear
But the light would not let me flee—so I turned to face its call


Through pain and years I allowed the light to purge me
guilt of the past eventually burned away like chaff
And new eyes could more clearly see
that the light of love remained—if only on my mother’s behalf
and at her request—with forge and fire—He set me free

Mine was a life reforged at 29
peaks and troughs of that life
are long left far behind
A father now with children and wife
Knowing the fullness of love—refined

I will plant the ‘sunseed’ as my mother did before
in the hearts of my children—deeply bored
so that if darkness should one day creep—
—to spite those shadows that soddenly steep—
the veil will fracture—freeing light once more…

Matthew – 2015
© 2015 This Mortal Flesh


21 thoughts on “Sunseed

  1. I’m so glad I wrote what I did a few minutes ago because *this* is what I was talking about. I just read it through three times and it’s good. Really good. You carry on writing my friend, it is your path.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Sunseed | This Mortal Flesh

  3. Pingback: Fight | This Mortal Flesh

  4. I do not mind telling you this made me cry. There is recognition in this piece, of what was, is now, and will be in future. There is a balance between darkness and light, and a message of hope eternal. This my incredible friend is a piece to be proud of.

    Liked by 1 person

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